To find a long term relationship, you must go after it. It
probably isn't going to fall into your lap.
Here are some tips to improve your success.
1. You have to go after the one you want and then win them
over. Be a friend - show attention, understanding,
acceptance, and appreciation.
2. Satisfy emotional needs- show interest and listen to
them. Spark a romantic emotion. Romance is a combination of
hope with some doubt and it adds up to passion. People want
what they can't have.
3. The third part of love is respect. It is earned through
your actions. You must show an independent and confident
personality. You can live with them or without them. You are
in no hurry and aren't desperate.
4. You really have to date several people at once. It will
make you look like a great catch. When you have multiple
options, anyone who wants to be with you will work much
harder. Instead of you doing the chasing, they will be
chasing you. This takes the pressure off of yourself. You
really want to date a few people anyway before jumping from
one long term relationship to another.
Dating Strategies to keep in mind:
You must be happy with yourself before you will have
success. Be kind to yourself and turn off the negative
thoughts. You can change what you can and forget the rest.
Don't worry about things you can't change. If you can't
change them, all the worry in the world wont do any good.
Set some goals and write them down. You must make a plan
with a clear path you want to follow.
You must set aside a night each week to get out of the
house. Go where others gather. Check the paper for ideas
and get out there. How many people have you met at your
house? Force yourself to go out anyway. It is only one night
a week, you can still sit on the couch the other six nights.
You aren't going to find new people unless you actually go
out.
There are single and available people all over the place.
Nearly every place you go, has single people if you LOOK.
Start simple don't go after the hottest person(too much
pressure). Talk to the average person, get a phone number
and move on. It really is a simple two step process. Meet
and greet, a short conversation with eye contact and then
say Great meeting you, but I have got to run; could I get
your number? The Key is to RELAX. The more you do this the
easier it gets.
Take the initiative and be the first to show interest in
them. It shows confidence. You are only trying to get that
first date. Don't start fretting about your wedding and
future children just yet. Keep it simple. But you must do
it yourself, no one will do it for you. Don't let an
opportunity pass by, get that phone number and go from
there.
Rejection is part of the dating game. Don't take it
personal, not everyone is going to want to date you. They
may not be dating at all right now. You never know unless
you ask. Don't be afraid of looking foolish, we all look
foolish all the time. Use positive reactions in the face of
rejection. You aren't worried if they say no. You asked and
that is the most important thing. One more no means you
didn't waste your time and money on someone who isn't even
interested. Plus you are just closer to finding the one who
is interested. It is all practice and will make you a
master at dating that much quicker.
Get out of the house and start looking tonight.
